Saturday, August 2, 2008

Desperately Living a Lie

I'm eating cold food
to cool me down at night,
and sighing into sheets
that still smell of you.

We both already know
I'm trying to move on;
desperately living a lie
we both need me to believe.

I can't speak for you,
I won't hope you're feeling
anything close to my heart,
because hoping leaves me broken.

Days drag on by routine alone
and memories stretch into night
and one seeps into the other
full of empty smiles.

Another night out,
another night in,
and all other men's attentions
just harasses me--they're not you.

They don't care,
they can change my mind
so they believe,
I can see it in their eyes.

I don't want to be pursued,
I just want to be caught,
I'm sick of the race,
just let me hit the finish line.

But I'm a runner by nature,
I'll hit the wall eventually
I'll breathe that second wind
draw it in and push on ahead.

Don't worry about me,
I'll still live the lie
like we decided we need,
just don't look me in the eye.

There's a girl you're searching for,
a path your feet need to climb,
maybe mine will cross yours again,
but for now, I'll be what we need.

2 comments:

  1. living the lie, feels good for the moment right? but i found out the hard way, it all crumbles in the end.

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  2. Your poetry is truly beautiful.

    Julieanne

    ReplyDelete